Reader Question: Sex in Cars?

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Here’s the latest reader question, along with my reply!

T asks: I read this the other day and started to wonder if a modern car (not SUV) even has enough room to “do it” in? I’ve read what you have to say about teens not getting a drivers license. No carbs. No dads. Uber. All these things lead to a general lack of interest in autos. I get that. But no sex? Back in the day, there was a tradition (at least in the Detroit area) of “breaking in” a new or used car when one received title to same. A ’63 Caprice, ’64 GTO, ’74 Riviera, ’84 Coupe de Ville. Many were conceived in these vehicles. There used to be a saying in Southeast Michigan: “As goes Detroit, so goes the country and the rest of the world.” Well, Detroit has been dead for almost 20 years now. Since you get a chance to review so many new cars, can the deed still be done? Or have the powers that be safetyed and CAFEed one of the most (if not the most) important functions of humanity to the history books?

My reply: It is still possible, if you’re really eager – and very limber. But two things have conspired to make it very difficult.

The first is bucket seats, which almost all cars have had exclusively for decades. There is a center console in the way.

You could go in the back – no center console (usually) but now you have much less room (also usually). Most modern cars have pretty tight back seats… for that, at least.

This is the second factor.

You’ve also still usually got the bucket seats as well. It makes it awkward.

There is a third factor as well: AGWs.

In the halcyon past, when the world was sane, if a cop saw a car parked in a dead end with the windows fogged up could probably be counted on to MYOB or at worst, rap on the glass with his flashlight and tell the couple to get a room.

Today, the buzz-cut Hut! Hut! Hutter! is likely to demand IDs and if the kids are under 18, he’ll probably call child protective services and ruin everyone’s life.

Also, those under 18 are not allowed in many states to drive with another teen in the car, at night especially. More Hut! Hut! Hutting!

If you are over 18, there are options. Crossovers and wagons make for nice love shacks.

But most sedans are too much trouble, AGW-wise or otherwise!

. . .

Got a question about cars – or anything else? Click on the “ask Eric” link and send ’em in!

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7 COMMENTS

  1. When I listen to some old country songs, I’m reminded of the fact that gone are the days when you could cruise down the road in a pickup with your sweetie sitting close beside you on a big bench seat.

    • Hi Anonymous,

      It used to be that – for the most part – only sporty cars had bucket seats. But then the marketing people convinced most people that they had to be driving a “sporty” car, even if it was a minivan. And so now, almost every car (and minivan and truck and SUV) has to try to look and seem “sporty,” too.

      People who’ve never enjoyed an American muscle car with three-across bench seats have missed out…

      • I absolutely HATE bucket seats in a pickup every time I try to jump in or out to open/close gates, or more importantly do the “picking up” for which the type was designed. Even the 60/40 “bench” is a drivers bucket seat and a pain in the butt literally to get in and out of.

        • Anon,

          My question to Eric was about cars, but what about the modern pickup tailgate action?

          Seems to me that unless you’re 6’8” or taller, the tailgate is unusable.

          I think there was a reason the old Chevy Luv truck got its name. That tailgate was the perfect height for the average murican.

          Even the 80’s Silverados were acceptable.

          But I need a stepladder to climb up and get a hammer out of a new pickup. Let alone a “nut.”

          And with a 6’ bed, AGWs, having the tailgate up seems to be an obstacle.

          • Morning, T!

            Yes – forget the tailgate… I’m 6ft 3, so taller than probably 90 percent of American men. And there is (cue Jackie Gleason voice) no way I could perform the act without standing on a milk crate. New trucks are redonkulous…

  2. Depends on how “modern” you mean, I guess.
    My 2002 Chrysler Concorde Limited is so freaking enormous that you could, quite literally, get busy in the trunk! – no BS, it’s that damn big.
    Of course, the back seat is where its at, cause as mentioned bucket seats up front complicate things.
    I do miss bench seats with a column shifter though, that clunk-clunk of dropping it in gear brings back many nostaglic memories, especially via grammas hopped up Impala.

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