Well, it’s official – more or less.
Dodge hasn’t released an obituary for it yet, but the guy in charge at Dodge – CEO Tim Kuniskis – says ”it’s history” after 2023.
The Hellcat, Dodge’s 700-plus horsepower thumb-in-the-eye to everything political correct as applied to cars.
“I will have this car, this platform, this powertrain as we know it through the end of ’23 . . . There’s two more years to buy a Hellcat, then it’s history.”
It’s not because Dodge is having any difficulty selling Hellcats – the supercharged V8 versions of models like the Charger and Challenger (there are also other models sold under the Jeep brand with the Hellcat’s engine, including the Ram 1500 and the Jeep Grand Cherokee). In fact, it is having trouble building them fast enough to meet demand for them.
Because no one else sells anything like them.
This isn’t Oldsmobile or Pontiac in its waning days.
Dodge is having trouble getting its V8 past Brandon’s – that is to say, Joe’s gas mileage mandatory minimums (CAFE) and “emissions” standards, which are not even about that anymore or just barely. Because “emissions” as once defined are barely being emitted in our day, having been almost entirely controlled decades ago – in the mid-late 1990s – by efficient combustion and extremely efficient post-combustion controls such as modern, three-way catalytic converters.
As it turns out, 99.8 percent is also just about the same percent “emitted” by modern cars that isn’t an emission . . . as these were once defined.
That being the noxious gasses resulting from inefficient/uncontrolled combustion that clouded (past tense) the air with smog and caused people health problems. They’ve been cleaned up. Have been cleaned up, since the ’90s. Which is why the air is clean and clear today.
If you want to see smog, you’ll have to watch it on YouTube.
Dial up Los Angeles, in 1970.
But “emissions” were quietly redefined – in the mid 2000s – order to resuscitate the raison d’ etre for the regulation thereof – by folding into the mix carbon dioxide, the gas that while “emitted” does nothing at all (as in zero percent) to cloud the skies with smog or cause people health problems.
But it creates huge compliance problems for any company that still builds internal combustion-engined cars, which necessarily “emit” C02 because C02 is not a byproduct of inefficient or uncontrolled combustion but of combustion, itself.
The only way to reduce it by 99.8 percent is to stop combusting.
Which is the answer to the political problem of combustion engines having been cleaned up such that they stopped emitting about 99.8 percent of the harmful emissions back in the ’90s.
It’s triggering in certain quarters. Like the sight of an Undiapered Face.
So government hey, presto’d them “dirty” again – by characterizing the C02 as a deadly climate-changing “emission.”
It is an assertion of grotesque and deliberate exaggeration, on par with the one about the “plague of the unvaxxed.” Both meant to instill fear for the purpose of achieving an end.
In this case, the end of the supercharged V8.
But not just them – and not just Dodge. The aim is to accomplish what the original “emissions” regime proved unable to: The extirpation via regulation of the internal combustion engine, itself.
They’d hoped to do it sooner – using “emissions” as formerly defined (the gasses that do – that did – cloud the skies and caused people health problems). But the engineers – damn them – managed to all-but-eliminate them without eliminating the internal combustion engine. They were even able to design 700-plus horsepower supercharged V8s that didn’t “emit” anything objectively objectionable.
It was like natural immunity – or just being healthy. No need for the Jab – or the regs.
And that just won’t do.
People would see what’s wanted – and why.
But they don’t see it. In part, because they’re not told. It’s not explained. Indeed, they are fed contrary explanations.
The sky is falling! We’re all going to die!
Unless . . .
And so they don’t get mad. They just sigh and hope for the best, telling themselves it’s just the way it is and even partially convincing themselves that the government is just looking out for their “health” – like the battered spouse who defends her husband when the cops show up.
So what will force-replace the Hellcat?
A gott-verdammt electric something-or-other. Which all-but-assures that Dodge, itself, will be “history” shortly after 2023, too.
Not because the electrified whatever-it-is won’t be Hellcat speedy. Electric cars do that well (if briefly). But an electric this is the same as an electric that. What makes a Hellcat something else is precisely the supercharged V8 that powers it, even if the electric-motored thing in the next lane is quicker.
It’s not the point.
A battery-powered Challenger or Charger is just another whatever. Differently shaped and styled, perhaps. But not much different, otherwise. This latter, some may remember, is why Oldsmobile and Pontiac died some 20 years ago. They once sold something different.
An Olds was an Olds – not a skin over a Chevy. Same for Pontiac. When they became skin jobs, they became irrelevant. Why buy the Chevy-under-its-skin when you could just buy the Chevy?
Hey, presto! No more Olds or Pontiac.
The same fate likely awaits Dodge, only its death will be unnatural – and sudden. Kind of like all the healthy young athletes suddenly dropping dead, also for artificially induced reasons.
. . .
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