Do you remember the Dodge Omni GLH? I do. Back in the ’80s, I raced one in my ’78 Camaro. I almost lost the race to the GLH. Either my Camaro wasn’t very quick or the GLH was. The truth lies somewhere in the middle.
The GLH was a hotted-up variant of the Dodge Omni, which was a compact-sized hatchback (two and four-door) that came out in ’78. It was – fundamentally – an economy car. A shitbox, in the words of the great Brock Yates. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. In the sense that many people would be happy if they could buy a brand-new “shitbox” for $4,469 today. That was the base price of a brand-new one back then and it’s why you could own one after just three years of making manageable payments on one. Today’s “shitboxes” start around $21k on the low end and that’s why it takes six years of making payments to own one. But you do get a touchscreen, which wasn’t available with the Omni.
The GLH was a special Omni. A sleeper Omni – because, after all, the Omni was a shitbox and no one expects a shitbox to be quick. I certainly didn’t, when one rolled up beside me at a red light. The driver of this “shitbox” revved his four cylinder engine and I snickered at him. The snicker disappeared shortly after the light when green. The shitbox was still beside me! This – as it turned out – was not just a special Omni shitbox (the GLH). It was a GLH-S. The “S” meant that in addition to the GLH upgrades – which centered on a turbocharged 2.2 liter four – you got a bigger turbo, plus an intercooler and high-performance exhaust. The combo produced 175 horsepower, which was probably only just shy of what the 5.7 liter 350 V8 that powered my ’78 Camaro was packing. 1978 was not exactly a high-performance year for the Camaro – including the top-of-the-line Z28, which had the same 350 as my Camaro did. It touted 175 horsepower. Mine maybe made closer to 200 with the headers and other stuff I’d added.
My Camaro was also probably at least 1,00 pounds heavier.
The race was this close. I “won” by about half a car length. I waved to the other driver. Then I went home to find out what it was that almost beat me. I found out it wasn’t a shitbox at all. It was an Omni GLH (Goes Like Hell) with the “S” upgrades, which were engineered by Carroll Shelby. Hence the “S.” This “shitbox” could get to 60 in 6.5 seconds, through the quarter in the low 15s and had a top speed of about 130 MPH. These were extremely respectable numbers for ’86 – which is the year the GLH-S came out.
Something similar is about to come out.
Dodge is going to be offering a hotted-up version of the Hornet, which isn’t a shitbox, per se. It’s just not selling. Literally. Dodge took the Hornet off the market for this year because the costs that had to be added – due to Trump’s tariffs – made the Hornet a hard sell. The tariffs apply because the Hornet is an Alfa Romeo Tonale, re-skinned and re-badged for America but built in Italy at the Stellantis plant in Pomigliano d’Arco, near Naples. That’s why it gets hit with the tariff-taxes, which have added bigly to the little crossover’s MSRP. The plan appears to be to bring it back for 2028 – in hotted-up form as the GLH-SRT. The word is that the Hornet’s 2.0 liter four will be tweaked to produce 324 horsepower, which would definitely result in it Going Like Hell – and then some.
Whether it will sell is another thing. 
Dodge originally intended for the Hornet to serve as a kind of consolation prize for buyers who wanted a Charger with an engine rather than a battery. The former was pulled out of the lineup the same year (2023) as the Hornet was brought in to – ostensibly – take its place.
The problem, of course, was that while the Hornet had an engine, it was a four cylinder engine. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, as such. The problem was it wasn’t a V8 (or even a V6) and while the turbo four made respectable power (268 hp) it wasn’t enough to make up for it being a four rather than a six or an eight. 
And not a Charger, either.
Maybe with more power (V8 power) it will connect with buyers who can’t afford the new Charger – which starts over $50k and (at the moment) only offers a six. The scuttlebutt is that the hotted-up Hornet will have a base price around $32k when it arrives for the 2028 model year. That would be about $20k less than the base price of the 2026 Charger and almost exactly the same as the base price of a 2023 Charger with a V6.
That might just sell.
. . .
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Yeah, I definitely remember the Dodge Omni GLH. I got my ass handed to me by one running light to light in Toledo, Ohio, when I was out driving around in my Mustang GT. I was at the light and this little shitbox pulls up next to me and I get the old “Rrrrrrrrwwwaaarrrrr!” as he revs his little motor to challenge me in my 5.0. It was a f**king Omni, so to be perfectly honest I didn’t give him any street cred at all (I hadn’t yet learned about the GLH, lol) so only left the light half-heartedly when he shot off like a rocket. I was like “WTF was THAT?!?” I never brushed off a Dodge Omni challenger again…little bastard.
Good times, letmepic, eh?
I miss ’em.
I sure do too.
My Dad bought a brand new 1984 Dodge Omni GLH, 2.2 non-turbo and manual transmission. Shelby tuned carburetor I think. It was fast enough. Where it really shined was on the winding rural roads. Those alloy rims gave it some unwanted ghetto bling… Dad junked it when the fuel tank started leaking.
Tick Trawler
Owner of 26 year old shitbox
During my younger years in the 1980s, 1990s, and early 2000s, shitboxes were everywhere, and driven by people from all walks of life.
I owned three shitboxes myself: a 1985 Ford Tempo, a 1993 Ford Tempo, and a 2002 Subaru WRX (which was the best shitbox I’ve owned.)
Shitboxes are the kinds of vehicles we need right now, for many reasons.
First and foremost, shitboxes are affordable. Teenagers working part time jobs and seniors on fixed incomes could easily afford them. Many people could even afford to pay cash for them—and did. What’s more, shitboxes are not only affordable to buy, but also affordable to drive, maintain, and fix—a function of their smaller size and greater simplicity.
Shitboxes conserve energy and natural resources. As a conservationist—NOT an environmentalist—I find waste and pollution abhorrent. It takes far fewer natural resources and creates less pollution and waste to build, drive, and dispose of shitboxes. You can keep them for well over a decade—unlike EVs which are toast in as little as five years.
Shitboxes are adaptable. You can have an El Strippo special with power nothing or a fully loaded jewel box—or a GLH. Many shitboxes came in numerous configurations for economy, luxury, and/or performance.
And today, we can build shitboxes that are far from, well, shitty. Technology like overdrive transmissions, port fuel injection, vehicle dynamics control systems like ABS, and improved suspension systems mean greater reliability and better driveability. Improved manufacturing and materials technology means better build quality. A modern iteration of a shitbox like the Dodge Omni—in standard form or as a GLH—would run better, handle better, go faster, last longer, use less energy, pollute less, and even cost less than the original.
But it’s not that we can’t do it—it’s that we won’t.
Trump needs a “tiny bit” of rope around his fat neck.
Stellantis is desperate to undo the damage that Carlos Tavares has done to Dodge, I reckon. Kinda like Dodge reentering nascar trucks this year and, supposedly, cup series next year.
“Driving the #10 Dodge Shitbox, Ty Dillon.”
If anyone who might want one is able to afford one…it just might sell.
The stat from a few years ago that a massive percentage of young people don’t even want to drive has not changed, to my knowledge. GovCo’s relentless Iron Fist of Obedience hasn’t rusted and gone away. And this thing will have a “Kill Switch” and all the other nanny tech that anyone who would like to drive the car as intended will avoid like the plague. And what GovCo doesn’t destroy, the Insurance Mafia will. Just take your universal basic income, tap your phone, watch some porn and beat your meat.
I hate to be a downer but, unless this empire collapses and takes the WEF’ers and Enviro-Commies with them I doubt it has a chance.
I can’t argue with that, Mark –
It’s very depressing – for me, a car guy who cares about this stuff a lot – to see what’s happening and likely to happen. I sometimes feel like quitting, selling my place to some scumbag developer and retiring to a holler in West Virginia to ride out the storm. But I’m stubborn and filled with anger toward these bastards and will use all my willpower and such skills as I have to fight them.
I share your outlook, Eric.
What got me into politics were the efforts in the early 70’s to kill horsepower with enviro regs and fun with safety BS. Enviro-Commies and Nanny Staters. Who ARE these people? And who gave them a say in what I want to buy? It became very clear that GovCo was the enemy. To top it off, moving from a state without mandatory insurance laws to one with (Ohio to Florida) it became clear that this grift was becoming ubiquitous.
The corral was being reduced in size until we are all herded up the chute into the abattoir.
The pressure cooker of tyranny is about to blow.