Codpiece Logic

Print Friendly, PDF & Email

Wearers of the Holy Facial Codpiece insist that it “works” but also that others wear one – indicating it doesn’t.

The fallback rationalization – and with this sickness, there is always a fallback rationalization – is that their Facial Codpiece protects you and thus you wearing what they always like to style “yours” (this is done for the same reason taxes are always predicated with your taxes –  imputing agreement before the argument with taxation even begins) is a matter of common decency.

But how so?

Your Facial Codpiece wards off the cooties of others – assuming it “works” – and that should be the end of your concern as my health isn’t any concern of yours, much less your responsibility … as yours isn’t mine. I don’t point out your beer belly and lecture you about losing weight – something manifestly related to your health (including your vulnerability to getting sick and getting sicker).

You’d probably tell me to MYOB – and some other things, too – if I, a complete stranger, accosted you in a store about your gut and how it increased your risk of diabeetus and other such things.

And yet people – many of them sporting very impressive guts – feel justified in accosting random strangers without guts whose faces they can see, even though their own faces can’t be seen due to the Codpiece covering it and – presumably – keeping them safe.

Which apparently they worry doesn’t, actually – hence the lastest trend in Facial Copiecing . . . multiple Codpieces. Which makes the wearer look like a ‘70s hair-band rock band front man with a sock in his latex pantaloons only on their faces.

Even doubled-down (and now presumably “working” even better) they still want you to wear “yours.” But not because it “protects” them – or even you; the pretense that they are that concerned about the “health” of random strangers is as laughable as it is unctuous. These people don’t give a shit about your “health,” the evidence being abundant that they don’t care much about their own.

Most of the Codpiece Wearers aren’t fit; indeed, there is an inverse relationship between actual health and the wearing – or not – of the Codpiece, which is the sartorial expression of a disconnected belief in the idea of being “healthy.”

If you want to see healthy faces, go to a gym. When you can’t see a face, look at the body. Odds are it is flabby. These fatties could decrease their chances of getting sick by orders of magnitude by working out – vs. the “working” Codpieces over their faces – but instead, these people feign concern about the health of people who are actually healthy, as by working out.

And not pretending they are sick.

The flabby are also over-represented among the ranks of those who advocated – and who enforce – the “locking down” of gyms and the general crippling of anything actually healthy, such as not sitting at home all day watching TeeVee while eating until you can’t eat anymore because there’s nothing else to do.

So , no – they aren’t exercised about your health.

Or theirs.

They are determined to make you complicit in the unhealthy. By making you wear what they wear, so as to make the wearing of it as expected – as normal – as the wearing of a shirt in public.

Which is an apt as well as an inapt comparison. Apt because both shirt and Codpiece are articles of clothing and social conventions are involved.

Inapt because while the not-wearing of a shirt may annoy those who prefer not to see your hairy belly it has no bearing on the health of others or even on the not-wearer himself. It is simply a matter of difference over aesthetics.

But with the difference being the marketing of the new article of clothing as having medicinal value, which is funny – and alarming at the same time – because the wearers who insist everyone wear don’t really believe in the touted medicinal value any more than the people who don’t wear. If this weren’t so, the wearers  wouldn’t be wearing two Codpieces – or even three – if the one actually did “work.”

Since the one is now admitted to not “work” – hence the new requirement for two, per the man who was selected president – you’d think they’d think about whether wearing more than one does more than increase their bulge.

But that would be thinking – and the only thing worse than thinking is acting on it.

. . . .

Got a question about cars, Libertarian politics – or anything else? Click on the “ask Eric” link and send ’em in!

If you like what you’ve found here please consider supporting EPautos. 

We depend on you to keep the wheels turning! 

Our donate button is here.

 If you prefer not to use PayPal, our mailing address is:

721 Hummingbird Lane SE
Copper Hill, VA 24079

PS: Get an EPautos magnet or sticker or coaster in return for a $20 or more one-time donation or a $10 or more monthly recurring donation. (Please be sure to tell us you want a magnet or sticker or coaster – and also, provide an address, so we know where to mail the thing!)

My eBook about car buying (new and used) is also available for your favorite price – free! Click here.  If that fails, email me at and I will send you a copy directly!


  1. How do you all do business? Not wearing a mask makes it to hard to buy stuff. I don’t wear a mask in a great amount of area’s , but what about stores? The stores around here can get a 8 thousand dollar fine from OSHA if they aren’t enforcing the mask rule.

    • A lot of curbside pick up, local farms, farmer markets, and eating outside. The few times I have been into a store they see a mid 40 year old chick without a mask and are speechless. I smile and say, good morning or good afternoon, and just keep walking to pick up what I need. I have been kicked out of AT&T and one restaurant in SC would not serve me (even sitting outside), but I really haven’t experienced too much conflict. Karens glare, but say nothing.

    • I’m in FL (duh!), and ‘round here, the small local shops don’t seem to care one way or the other. Nobody has ever said a word to me about not being diapered. The box stores, Lowe’s, Home Depot, Target, etc, plus the Publix supermarkets all have “policies” and signs saying they require masks, but it’s not enforced at any of them, and you see a fair number of people sans diaper. The only time anyone ever said anything to me was a male Karen at Home Depot, and that was months ago. The only place I’ve encountered that will NOT let you in without a diaper is Costco. No problem, fuck them. Went down the road and joined BJ’s. Like the other boxes, they have the policy, but don’t enforce it. I guess how well you’re able to do business depends a lot on where you live.

    • The OSHA thing may be a sign of the recent federalization of this nonsense by Old Joe. I’m curious to see how that plays out. They’re being very loud about “enforcement” but it isn’t clear what the reality is.

  2. where I live – upper mc white suburb in central coast California – the could tell the locals to “put a plastic bag over your head and cinch it real tight to fight the flu ’cause we’re all in this together!”….

    and the sheep would bleat and do it.

  3. I like the ones standing outside of my building with a diaper hanging on their chins and smoking a cigarette.
    I think most people just do what they are told devoid of any rational thinking. The sign says put on a mask so that is what they do.

  4. Damn it! I’m trying to pay attention here, but these women’s underwear ads keep popping up right in the middle of the articles, and one click and I’m off to a much more pleasant topic. Must…..resist…..

    • Oh, you lucky dog, getting the ladies underwear ads! The NSA and Google must know how old i am, all I ever see is Depends and Metamucil!

      • I must add though, at my age, a good healthy shit is more satisfying than the ladies anyway. Those hot MILFs in my neighborhood who want me tonight would likely be disappointed.

        • Ah, you know.
          Evacuate your bowels, void your bladder, void your testicles.
          Wash your hands, brush your teeth, take your vitamins.
          Time for first cup of coffee.
          Morning rituals.
          Coffee the most satisfying.

  5. Eric,
    Here is a comment from the creator of the NRA from the 1930’s on the NRA:
    ‘It is just here that the mobilization of public opinion becomes important. If it is commonly understood that those who are cooperating are soldiers against the common enemy within, and those who omit to act are on the other side, there will be little hanging back. The insignia of governmental (Blue Eagle) approval on doorways, letterheads, and invoices will become a necessity in business. This method was used with success in 1918. It is a short cut to action and to the public support, without which no such plan can succeed. … (this should lay forever the repeated assertion that the Blue Eagle was an afterthought). ” Hugh Johnson “The Blue Eagle from Egg to Earth”, pg 156

    Replace blue eagle with ‘mask’ and you get the idea…

    • I have said all along that the main purpose of the facemask is to remind people to be scared. And I don’t mean that flippantly.

      Government in a crisis WANTS people to scared. They WANT people to be looking to them for a “solution”. They WANY people to give them more power. Making them scared does that. Just like with the blue eagle, the strengthening of government power doesn’t happen without public buy-n.

      Very early on, in May or thereabouts when the “masking” really picked up, I realized quickly that the simple act of wearing the mask makes me complicit in the fear and forcing me to wear the mask forces me to spread that message, even if I don’t want to. It is therefore a first amendment violation and a violation of my freedom of conscience. Period. End of story. I don’t care what courts say. I only care what the truth is.

      Do I think that government is trying to spread fear on purpose? I generally don’t think so. I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt that most of them are acting in good faith and THINK they are doing the right thing by encouraging “safety” and “courtesy”.

      But the “mandatory” part of the masking is definitely willful and on purpose. They know that without public buy-in, the political powers can’t be wielded as freely.

    • Hi Mark,

      Captain Tom Wood has just died! From Corona! He was only 100…

      Being 100 had nothing to do with it.

      Of course, it had everything to do with it. Anyone who dies at that age has died a normal death. But I suppose some believe that if only he’d worn three Diapers and gotten the Jab – and all of us had worn four Diapers and received two jabs – he’d still be alive today…

      • Oh, the irony! Battling pneumonia for several weeks prior also had nothing to do with it. 🙂

        Seems that convid extends one’s life expectancy as most deaths are well above the average LE. That wascally viwus just doesn’t know how to behave!

        In all seriousness, RIP Sir Tom Moore.

  6. The highly pathetic thing is that the Medical Industrial Complex pushing forth the “science” on behalf of our “health” is less concerned about our health than nearly anything else. For example, it gives little consideration to nutrition as a significant health factor, in spite of the indisputable fact it is likely one of the MOST significant health factors. Don’t believe me? Get admitted to a hospital and eat a few nearly nutrition free hospital meals. The only practical nutritional advice it will give is “don’t get fat, and if you are fat, lose weight”. Which any sane reasonable person already knows, and far too often ignores. So the notion that wearing one mask or four is for your health is wildly misplaced. If there is one thing they do NOT care about it’s your health. Medicine, being almost completely incorporated, has no human characteristics. Driven by profit alone, as practically all corporations are.

  7. Chicken Lee Broth!

    Also, you’re running wild with your mask pejoratives, Eric!

    Next it’ll be an oral jock-strap? Hard to keep up with the barrage of belittling Peteritudes.

    • Morning, BaDnOn!

      I learned an important thing from the Left – to ridicule the opposition. That which is ridiculous is very hard to respect and once you take away respect, it is very hard to maintain Authoritah. Who wants to wear a Face Diaper? Or a Facial Codpiece?

  8. I recently posted a comment that every virtue signaling M.D.
    barking about the use of multiple masks needs to be taken into a courtroom and forced to show their research data. How coincidental this past weekend, that Father Fauci reversed his own “advice” on wearing two masks due to “No data indicating that that is going to make a difference.”

    Also Eric….May your mother live to see her 100th birthday.
    I wish her health and happiness.

    • if you had a family member with dementia you dont wish that. you want them well cared for and to die comfortably when God calls them. In my moms case she was all gone when God called her. Its the worst way to go possible.

      • My father suffered from dementia for 12 years…Our family spent hours searching for him in the community, as he walked out of a nursing home on Thanksgiving day in the year 2000….Everyone`s sentiments are different…We did our best to enjoy his company despite the illness.

  9. You can ask them “Your health is whose responsibility?” If they come back with any answer that includes YOU the questioner, you can say, “Ok, drop and give me 20. Right now! You said your health was MY responsibility, so I’m taking that responsibility seriously. Throw out all that crap you have in your cart. You’re not eating that.”

    Make them feel stupid for what they just said and believe.

    • Michael,

      these people are too busy feeling righteous to feel stupid.

      i can’t tell if the looks i get in the store are jealousy or disbelief that someone would dare enter public with a face veil, but the ones who aren’t covering to avoid confrontation seem to have bought all the pseudoscience that covid has to offer

  10. Well, that’s just it. Starts and ends with the premise that “your mask protects me.”

    And these obese slobs, many with T2D, who rely on their blood pressure and cholesterol medicines to make their way in the world, feel they need this protection. Much easier, than, say, eating vegetables, laying off the pasta, stopping the alcohol and cigarettes; or (gasp!) going out for a run, hike, bike ride, or even a daily walk around their neighborhood.

    Of course they’re at risk – mostly self induced – and we can never expect these selfish pigs to reflect on the poor choices they made and make changes. So they project that onto us. We are somehow obligated to protect them from the situation they both put themselves in and continue to maintain.

    Easier to snuggle into a face diaper than to improve your cardiovascular system. Same as it’s easier to pop statins than to forego steaks, potatoes, and beer.

  11. Our family used to visit Colonial Williamsburg several times a year. This is where I first heard of the codpiece. While it was mildly amusing to occasionally see one on one of the re-enactors, the fact that CW (a Rockefeller-funded entity) has now decided that all re-enactors and visitors must wear a facial codpiece has meant that our family will never return.

    On our visits, we often heard with pride how CW so carefully researched historical paints, floor coverings, fabrics, costumes, etc. But despite the fact that it is not even historically (nor medically) accurate, they have thrown their proud heritage away in favor of some modern virtue signalling. None for me, thanks.

  12. Fraud-chi dk’d the 2 mask thing already. There’s no data to support that…

    An acquaintance who lives in the MD suburbs of DC and whose beliefs and lifestyle typify the area posted on her FB that she got the ‘vid (apparently the new funny, haha, nickname for this so-called plague among this set.). She’s got a “mild” case, f/k/a the sniffles and is fine. Seeing this there is hope one might infer some things with respect to the diapering and other ritual humiliations of the sickness cult. But, being that this whole episode has not affected these folks financially, and many actually enjoy the accoutrements of the plague LARPing and all the political virtue that they signal, I’m not optimistic.

  13. codpiece = hilarious

    My response to the “your mask protects me and mine protects yours” nonsense is, “Why don’t you turn your mask inside out, then? (and leave me alone!)”


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here