Reader Question: Hut! Hutting! the AGWs?

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Here’s the latest reader question, along with my reply!

Jim asks: Last weekend, my son was invited to a birthday pool party. Sadly, a little boy drowned at the party; thanks to quick thinking, we were able to revive him. The first two to arrive after my 911 call were local cops. They did this slow shuffle when they arrived. I was absolutely appalled that these AGWs would respond nonchalantly to a call of a child who had drowned. So, because I do what is best, regardless of any consequences, I screamed at them like a drill instructor. It went like this:  “Let’s go! Move, move, move, a child’s life is on the line, move your ass!” The cops really did not like this but they did move their overpaid asses.

After all was said and done, one of them gave me a thumbs up, I assume because I was the one to get them moving. So, the reason I’m telling you this story is I actually got to “Hut-Hut-Hut” some cops. It felt good!

Thanks for your always awesome blog.

My reply: I am very glad the boy was revived – no thanks to the AGWs, probably. The indifference you describe is apparently general. It is also ironic – given we are expected to regard AGWs as “heroes.”

But real heroes take risks for the sake of others, often at risk to themselves – and without expectation of being paid to do so. This rules out AGWs – who get paid to enforce laws, not protect persons or property.

I agree with the late (and very great) Will Grigg – who advised never calling AGWs on the theory that there is practically no situation so bad that calling them won’t make it worse.

You’re probably lucky the AGWs didn’t Taze you for affronting their Authoritah.

Thanks for the kind words!

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    • Years ago I was strapped to a backboard and hauled to the horsepital. A goddamn deputy got in and just rattled on and on. The backboard was killing me. It makes my back straighter than I can tolerate with pain. The deputy kept saying I was a nervous wreck or similar from the wreck. I wanted to kill him but couldn’t reach him. What I WAS doing was turning everything into a joke and was doing a pretty good monologue. This was for me, how I react to pain I can’t get away from.

      I didn’t appreciate him practically calling me a pussy and the EMT’s didn’t seem to be keen on any part of it. Later, when in the ER, he’s there too. WTF business is it of his? Much later when I was released, he wondered out loud why I didn’t have a drug test. Sure, drug test the victim. The other driver only got a ticket I later found out. I got sorta excited when a KW W900L went flying through the air right beside me as he’d ridden up on my trailer and load. It’s just not something I’d seen and felt before. When I”m alive and in pain, I don’t appreciate being harassed by anyone.

      As usual the DPS showed up just as I was being hauled away and I’d been sitting in the crewtruck chilling down and being pissed. At least people who witnessed it were nice to me, offering me a sit in a cool pickup and something to drink. If it wasn’t beer I didn’t want it, had a whole cooler full of water.

      • And then the fire calls … I could go on all day about them interfering in fire suppression operations.